Schools, Organizations & Entities

Swedhump Elementary

Dash’s school.
Principal: Mrs. Rosebank
Probably the best school in the world.
Definitely has the best teachers in the world.
Named after the hump of a swed, a two-faced humped creature.

Stumpnose Elementary

Principal: Professor Inspector Josiah Stumpnose
Rival school to Swedhump Elementary.
Smells of sardines in some areas.
Most kids who attend this school are known to be:
[1] awful or
[2] rude or
[3] mean or
[4] or have terrible table manners
[5] or all of the above

Quadcycle Training Academy

World’s most famous quadcycle training school.
Their 3-week introductory courses are particularly good.
Mr. Ibis was instrumental in setting up their online courses.

Scallywag Academy

Scallywag Academy is the world’s most famous Scallywag school.
To graduate, the candidate needs to master at least 27,004 moves. Advanced candidates have been known to master over 30,000 moves.
The location of the Academy is unknown. Because Dash is constantly being pestered by Scallywags, and they always seem to land up on the dark side, he is determined to find where the school is, and have a good, long chat to its principal.

Triplocopter Flight Training Academy

If you want to fly a triplocopter, go to TFTA.
It’s the world’s best Triplocopter Flight Training Academy.
It’s also the world’s only Triplocopter Flight Training Academy.
Extremely competitive to get a place.
James Hogsbottom used to work there as a test pilot.

Zip-Lining Emporium

Huge zip-lining park at Swedhump Elementary.
Actually the world’s largest.
Designed by Ms. Greenacre.
Has over 2,700 different zip-lines.

Darwin Cycles

Top secret quadcycle factory.
Rumored that Mr. Ibis used to work there.

It is very difficult to get any information on this facility, and most reporting on it gets censored.

Aqualinia Waterpark

Probably the world’s best waterslide park.
Ms. Aqualine is the founding chairwoman of the Aqualine Corporation, which established the waterpark in 2019. The Aqualine Corporation is also renowned for its pool floaties which are sold worldwide. The pinkfish, sweds and osteops are particularly popular.

The park charges a single 24-hour entrance fee which allows the user to go on any of the 872 rides and eat and drink as much as they want in any of the 32 cafeterias and restaurants. Every ticket holder gets automatically entered into an annual lottery, the winner of which gets free lifetime entrance to the park for themselves and 1,000 close friends and family, plus a lifetime supply of Aqualinia Corporation floaties for all of them.

Entrance is free for people born on a Wednesday between 3 and 4pm (which is when Andrea Aquiline was born). An original waterproof birth certificate needs to be produced when applying for this concession.

Currently the most popular rides in the park are:

Ride 16: The Undulating Vestibule of Perfection
Ride 33: The Glandulated Chute of Rectification
Ride 84: The Vibrating Magoon of Awesomeness-ness
Ride 111: The Imbroligiated Massala of Excoriation
Ride 274: The Discombobulating Palisade of Nothingness
Ride 481: The Obnibulating Elongation of Suggestivosity
Ride 683: The G’snickulated Paternoster of Woff-osity
Ride 872: The Ossifying Carbuncle of Wemm-sniffication

Sniffsonian Museum

World’s most famous and important museum of natural history, artefacts, trivia, miscellany and heemo-globule globules.
Owned and curated by Mr. Sniffy.